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Archive for May, 2026

I liked Mason Currey’s Daily Rituals, so I picked up this book about how various artists fund their creative lives. Like his previous book, it offers interesting glimpses into different artists’ lives and their attitudes toward money.

There is no single correct way to fund a creative life. Some people succeed by pursuing creative work on the side. Others need to devote themselves fully before they can make progress. And some people, without external constraints, end up wasting their time. Each of us has to find an arrangement that fits our personality and that we can live with.

Frugality helps as it provides more options. But for certain pursuits, such as professional sports and chess, age and timing also matter. I admire artists who give everything to creating art or mastering their craft. But a chaotic and uncertain life does not suit my temperament. So I chose to focus on building financial security first, before shifting more of my time toward hobbies in my late 30s and early 40s.

Overall, I think that choice has worked out well. The encouraging thing is that it is not too late to begin and improve at many artistic activities. And while I cannot compete in sports at a professional level, there are still enough opportunities to play with others. I can also enjoy simply practising on my own.

Excerpts:

This reader is someone powerfully drawn to a life in the arts and at the same time powerfully stumped by the difficulty of balancing those ambitions with the very real need to pay rent and put food in the fridge. Sure, there are some well-worn paths forward: Get a day job and do your creative work in your spare time. Go to graduate school and try to find a foothold in academia that encourages or at least tolerates your art-making practice. Pursue a sort-of-related career–journalism for writers, say, or graphic design for visual artists–and hope to channel your artistic impulses into this more financially secure profession. Find somewhere extremely affordable to live and get by on a little income as possible. Become a genius at applying for–and winning–grants, fellowships, residencies, retreats, contests, and other funding opportunities. Coax money out of your parents, acquire a patron, or attract a life partner who’s willing to subsidise your art. Or–most elusive of all–make your art pay, by tailoring it to the market place or somehow forcing the culture to come to you.

The dumb truth is that there is no cultural production without financial supports. It is simply not possible to become an accomplished painter or musician or novelist or pet without spending a lot of time experimenting, making false starts, starting over, starting over again, absorbing criticism, thinking, reading, talking, and mooning about the house aimlessly. All this time has to be purchased, one way or another.

Leonard [Virginia Woolf’s husband] writes: “Neither of us ever took a day’s holiday unless we were too ill to work or unless we went away on a regular and, as it were, authorised holiday. We should have felt it was not merely wrong but unpleasant not to work every morning for seven days a week and for about eleven months a year. Every morning, therefore, at about 9.30 after breakfast each of us, as if moved by a law of unquestioned nature, went off and “worked” until lunch at 1. It is surprising how much one can produce in a year, whether of buns or books or pots or pictures, if one works hard and professionally for three and a half hours every day for 330 days.

According to a personal secretary employed by the Ives family for a time, “Mr. Ives would come home from a strenuous day in the insurance business, have his meal, and then go [to] the piano and forget all about time until the wee small hours. He would be completely absorbed in his music.”

In truth, it’s not so easy to make one version of your art just for money and then pivot to the other version, the one you make without worrying about money and maybe even in defiance of it. Trying to do both things at once may prevent you from doing either of them well. And if you succeed at one, the world may not let you pivot to the other.

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It’s been a while since I prepared a meal for others. Back in university, a few friends and I had an informal cooking club, where each of us took turns cooking for the others every month. We took notes and documented our dishes and comments afterward. It was a good opportunity to get together with friends, try something new, and enjoy good food.

Recently, I decided to cook a meal for my family. When my boys said they wished there had been more food and wanted to eat my cooking regularly, I knew the meal was a success. While it’s satisfying to cook a nice meal and see others enjoy it, the opportunity costs are high. It took about two hours to prepare and cook, plus another one to two hours to plan and buy the ingredients. Since I don’t plan to become a chef, I think it’s something I’ll only do occasionally.

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Ross Levine wrote a series of imagined letters from Adam Smith’s perspective.

Why do we work so hard even after many of us have met our survival needs? Often it’s because we believe wealth brings admiration and approval from others. But admiration from others is fickle and not a source of lasting happiness.

What we really crave is to be worthy of admiration: “The love of praise seeks the opinions of others. The love of praiseworthiness seeks inner integrity.”

We should direct our ambition toward becoming worthy of our inner judge: “True satisfaction comes not from wealth, titles, accolades, or applause, but from acting in harmony with the impartial spectator’s standards.”

Back in university, I read several biographies of Adam Smith, along with his books and lectures, and came to admire his broad range of intellectual interests and his insights into human psychology. He and David Hume would be among my top choices for dinner companions.

PS: There’s a musical based on Adam Smith’s The Wealth of Nations. Here’s a Freakonomics podcast interview with its composer, David Lang.

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I drew this back in 2023

Like many basketball players, I’ve dreamed of being able to dunk. But when I was younger, I never took that dream seriously. At 180 cm, it felt unrealistic. I wasn’t particularly athletic, and I couldn’t even touch the rim.

In recent years, as I became fitter, I started seeing videos of people shorter than me jumping high enough to dunk. Most were younger, but they showed me it was possible. So I made a bet with my boys that I would dunk a small ball within five years, before turning 45. They both bet against me, which only made me more motivated.

My first recorded attempt was in May 2023, when I still couldn’t touch the rim. From there, I added strength training, plyometrics, sprinting, and jump-specific work to my routine. It took about half a year to touch the rim, another year to dunk a small massage ball, and then I plateaued.

Training in my 40s has been tough. Work, travel, sickness, poor sleep, and life events all interrupted my progress. Recovery takes longer, and pushing too hard usually leads to knee pain. Progress was slow, uneven, and sometimes frustrating.

But this year, almost three years after I started, I finally dunked a size 1 basketball, and eventually a size 3 basketball. While it is not as cool as dunking a proper basketball in a game, it is good enough for me. I don’t want to risk injury chasing too much more, though a size 5 alley-oop dunk remains an optional next challenge.

My boys treated me to ice cream, and we also celebrated together at one of our go-to izakayas. This goal has little practical value for most people, but it gave me tremendous satisfaction. I’m happy to have finally fulfilled a childhood dream.

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I like David Whyte’s writing. He explores the fundamental feelings we regularly experience but often take for granted, providing a space for us to reflect on them.

Excerpts:

The measure of our courage is the measure of our willingness to embrace disappointment, to turn towards it rather than away; the understanding that every real conversation of life involves having our hearts broken somewhere along the way and that there is no sincere path we can follow where we will not be fully and immeasurably let down and brought to earth, where what initially looks like a betrayal eventually puts real ground under our feet.

Disappointment is a friend to transformation, a call to both accuracy and generosity in the assessment of our self and others, a test of sincerity and a catalyst of resilience. Disappointment is just the initial meeting with the frontier of an evolving life, an invitation to reality, which we expected to be one particular way and turns out to be another, often something difficult, more overwhelming and strangely, in the end, more rewarding.

In the course of the years, a close friendship will always reveal the shadow in the other as much as ourselves; to remain friends we must know the other and their difficulties, and even their sins, and encourage the best in them, not through critique but through addressing the better part of them, the leading creating edge of their incarnation, thus subtly discouraging what makes them smaller, less generous, less of themselves.

Giving is not done easily; giving is difficult. Giving well is, in fact, a discipline that must be practised and observed over years to be done properly. The apprenticeship to the art often involves giving the wrong thing to the wrong person at the wrong time, and learning how to do the opposite through time and trial; it means getting beyond the boundaries of our own needs; it means understanding another and another’s life. Most importantly, it acknowledges implicitly that we ourselves must be recipients of things we cannot often identify or even find ourselves.

Heartbreak is an indication of our sincerity; in a love relationship, in a life’s work, in trying to learn a musical instrument, in the attempt to shape a better, more generous self. Heartbreak is the beautifully helpless side of love and affection, and is just as much an essence and emblem of care as the spiritual athlete’s quick but abstract ability to let go. Heartbreak has its own way of inhabiting time, and its own beautiful and trying patience in coming and going.

…heartbreak is as inescapable and inevitable as breathing, a part and a parcel of every path, asking for its due in every sincere course an individual takes. It may be that there may be not only no real life without the raw revelation of heartbreak but no single path we can take within a life that will allow us to escape without having that imaginative organ we call the heart broken by what it holds and then has to let go.

Loneliness is the place from which we pay real attention to voices other than our own; being alone allows us to find the healing power in the other. The shortest line in the briefest e-mail can heal, embolden, welcome home and enliven the most isolated identity. Lonely human are lonely because they are made to belong. Loneliness is a single malt taste of the very essentiality that makes conscious belonging possible. The doorway is closer than we think. I am alone; therefore, I belong.

Sincere regret may, in fact, be a faculty for paying attention to the future, for sensing a new tide where we missed a previous one, for experiencing timelessness with a grandchild where we neglected a boy of our own. To regret fully is to appreciate how high the stakes are in even the average human life. Fully experience, regret turns our eyes, attentive and alert, to a future possibly lived better than our past.

Unconditional love is not fully possible, unconditional love is the necessary dream-like destination where we never fully arrive. We are mortal creatures of living and dying, and how we love and what we love is conditional upon where we stand in the drama and the seasonality of our living and dying. Love may be sanctified and ennobled by its commitment to the unconditional horizon of perfection, but what makes love real in the human world seems to be our moving, struggling conversation with that wanted horizon rather than any possibility of arrival. The hope for, or the declaration of, a purely spiritual, unconditional love is more often a coded desire for immunity and safety, an attempt to forgo the trials of vulnerability, powerlessness and the exquisite pain to which we appreciate ourselves in a relationship, a marriage, in raising children, in a work we love and desire.

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Too much free time can be dangerous. It is easy to fall into temptations that offer short-term pleasure but little long-term satisfaction, or spend too much time ruminating on things outside our control. In my teens, I often reflected on meaning of life questions that had no clear answers. But as life becomes busier and obligations grew, those questions became less relevant. In that sense, busy work can be beneficial, as it provides structure and constraints to our free time and channels it to a clear objective.

Yet being too busy comes with its own cost. I want to be productive and dislike wasting time. So I often skim articles, listen to podcasts at 2.5x speed, and have back to back activities. That can be efficient, but it can also create a rushed existence in which important things can be easily overlooked. If I’m too rushed or goal oriented, I tend to be less patient, less kind, and less likely to enjoy the small joys and quiet beauty that exist.

Perhaps that is why I am drawn to Enuma Okoro’s column. She introduces me to paintings and connects them to our lives and times. I admire that way of engaging with art. But if the goal were simply to extract meaning, I could just ask ChatGPT to analyze a painting for me. What I rarely do, however, is slow down enough to look carefully, absorb what I am seeing, and connect it more deeply to life. I think that mindfulness is what I value most in her work.

To get the most out of her columns, I need to slow down, look at the paintings, and reflect on her thoughts. It is not surprising that she is a fan of David Whyte. Like her writing, his poems and essays reward slow reading and reflection. Maybe not everything requires this kind of mindfulness. But I think the more we can engage in this kind of awareness, the more alive we feel.

From her recent column:

One of the elements that I love about abstract works is how they compel us to patiently engage with what is in front of us until they reveal a new perspective, while also inviting us to learn how to sit with the discomfort of not knowing immediately what we are looking at. One of the many invitations that I think we can extract from this is to consider where in our own lives we are being invited to sit in the discomfort of not yet knowing and allowing room to slowly discern what might be in the process of being revealed to us. And also to consider what aspects of our lives may have already taken on a new shape or a new form, which is simply waiting for us to recognise it.

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