When we live in a different country and see how other people do things, we tend to reflect on our own culture. Growing up in different places might have broaden my mind a bit, but reading this article on Iceland tells me there are much more out there to explore. Although Iceland’s culture is very different from Asian culture, I find it makes just as much sense. It is interesting to think about how each society evolves its own culture and norms that works for its people.
Highest birth rate in Europe + highest divorce rate + highest percentage of women working outside the home = the best country in the world in which to live. There has to be something wrong with this equation. Put those three factors together – loads of children, broken homes, absent mothers – and what you have, surely, is a recipe for misery and social chaos. But no….in terms of wealth, health and education – they are champions of the world…in so far as one can reliably measure such things…Icelanders are the happiest people on earth.
But none of this happiness would be possible without the hardy self-confidence that defines individual Icelanders, which in turn derives from a society that is culturally geared…to bring up happy, healthy children, by however many fathers and mothers…’Patchwork families are a tradition here,’ explained Oddny, who was off work, at home, on the Thursday morning we met, looking after her youngest child. ‘It is common for women to have kids with more than one man. But all are family together.’ When a child’s birthday comes around, not only do the various sets of parents turn up for the party, the various sets of grandparents – and whole longboats of uncles and aunts – come too.
It is a largely pagan country, as the natives like to see it, unburdened by the taboos that generate so much distress elsewhere. That means they are practical people. Which, in turn, means lots of divorces. ‘That is not something to be proud of,’ said Oddny, with a brisk smile, ‘but the fact is that Icelanders don’t stay in lousy relationships. They just leave.’ And the reason they can do so is that society, starting with the parents and grandparents, does not stigmatise them for making that choice. Icelanders are the least hung-up people in the world. Thus the incentive, for example, ‘to stay together for the sake of the kids’ does not exist. The kids will be just fine, because the family will rally round them and, likely as not, the parents will continue to have a civilised relationship, based on the usually automatic understanding that custody for the children will be shared.
At a British university a pregnant student would be an oddity; in Iceland, even at the business-oriented ReykjavikUniversity, it is not only common to see pregnant girls in the student cafeteria, you see them breast-feeding, too. ‘You extend your studies by a year, so what?’ said Oddny. ‘No way do you think when you have a kid at 22, “Oh my God, my life is over!” Definitely not! It is considered stupid here to wait till 38 to have a child. We think it’s healthy to have lots of kids. All babies are welcome.’
The country is crawling with writers, painters, film makers and – like Oddny – accomplished musicians…As for writers, half the population appears to have written a book…Why is there such an abundance of artists in Iceland? What drives them? ‘We do it so as not to become mad,’ replied Haraldur, who is tall, nervy and thin with eyes that have the concentrated energy of a laser beam. Not to become mad? ‘Yes, to keep the beast at bay.’ The beast? ‘The beast is Iceland, this island on which we live with its terrifyingly harsh nature, its bitter ever-changing weather.
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