As I grow older, I care less about what others think of me. Perhaps this is because I’m more self sufficient and can decide with whom I want to spend my time. As long as people I care understand me, what others think matters less. Real friends should be more forgiving of my little mishaps and less likely to be jealous of my fortunes.
But why do I play worse piano in front of an audience, feel awkward in a big party, or unwilling to do things (e.g. dance) that might make me look stupid in public? Intellectually I understand that we are all going to die someday, and others generally care much less about me than I do. So I should be less afraid to try more things or look stupid. But in reality it’s not easy to break this tendency, and being overly self-conscious could act like a self-imposed constraint.
I was wondering what Chat GPT has to say about this and below is its response:
Why do humans feel self-conscious?
Self-consciousness is a feeling of being aware of one’s own thoughts, feelings, and actions, as well as how these may be perceived by others. It is a normal and natural part of human psychology and can serve as a way for people to reflect on themselves and their behavior.
There are several reasons why humans may feel self-conscious. One reason is social comparison, or the tendency to evaluate oneself by comparing oneself to others. This can lead to feelings of self-consciousness when we perceive that we are not measuring up to the standards or expectations of others.
Another reason is self-awareness, or the ability to introspect and think about one’s own thoughts and feelings. This can lead to self-consciousness when we become aware of our own thoughts and feelings and how they may be perceived by others.
Self-consciousness can also be a result of social anxiety, or the fear of being judged or evaluated negatively by others. This can lead to feelings of self-consciousness in social situations where there is a fear of being judged or evaluated.
Overall, self-consciousness is a complex and multifaceted feeling that can arise for a variety of reasons and can be influenced by both internal and external factors.
Social comparison is not healthy. Self-awareness shouldn’t affect my performance. It seems like social anxiety is what I care about most. With practice I probably can mitigate the negative effect of being overly self-conscious, and channel it to come up with higher quality work.
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